When I was pregnant, I thought I would come to rely on a piece of equipment. Maybe a specific onsie type or the baby swing would become so indispensable I would list it as the one thing I couldn’t live without.
Here’s the truth, there is not one single item related to the baby I could’t live without. Eliminating some things would make life more difficult than others, but I could live without it all.
No, the one thing I can’t live without… the one thing I need more than anything is reliability.
Reliability is a simple concept, but it is so hard to find in today’s world. Electronics are designed to break or decrease efficiency so you are forced to buy new ones. People make and break plans last minute via text or social media. Everyone feels entitled to cancel (or make new plans) 30 minutes before people are supposed to be there.
Being a new parent is hard, and incredibly isolating. Sometimes the smallest frustrations can drive someone over the edge, so today’s lackadaisical attitude towards plans and reliability is incredibly rough.
As a new parent, I can absorb anything into the routine… but it has to be routine. Washing everything by hand is easier on the average new parent than an on-again-off-again dishwasher that only sometimes works. Unreliable tools and people can quickly become unnecessary pain points.
So if you are about to be a new parent, do your best to surround yourself with reliability. Reliable products that just work and do what they are supposed to every time. And reliable people who won’t ask you to re-plan your day to fit them in only to cancel last minute.
And if you are a friend or extended family to a new parent, please understand that you must also be reliable. If you say you are going to do something, do it and do it promptly. If you ask a new parent to meet you somewhere, don’t cancel last minute.
I find that as a new parent, my tolerance for unreliablility is almost non-existant. If a piece of equipment stops working, I am more likely to get a new one (and a different brand) than go through the hassle of fixing it.
But my impatience also extends to my friends. I understand that other people have lives, but if you make plans and then cancel on me last minute twice? I stop caring about your opinion and planing for you to be in my life. I don’t have the energy or the mental capacity to chase after you.
So, if you are looking to help out a pregnant friend or new parent; just be reliable. That is the best gift you can give.
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Jane
Jane Reid, the primary author of Unprepared Mom and STEM 911, is an educator, tutor, women’s rights advocate, and mom. Here to make your life easier one article at a time.